Stop Love Shaming Me

Love shaming. Please, let's just quit cold turkey.

Yes, think body shaming or slut shaming but instead people are getting bashed for loving someone. WHAT?! It sounds absolutely ridiculous.  You would think people would just love the world around them including those in love.  Oh... so not the case! And it's heart breaking, annoying, and sad.


I've experienced it first hand and I've heard people doing it about others. I just don't get it.  Why would we ever want someone to feel horrible about the adventure that they're on?  Who are we to judge?  And why are we so fast to do so?

What I'm talking about is not when a friend has true concerns about the health of a relationship and expresses them with a sincere heart.  I'm talking about the snide comments, the looks, the talking behind their "friends" backs, or the mockery that happens around "quick" relationships.  It may just be my age group that does it, I 'm not sure.  But I think it's "easy" for my age group to do it because everyone is in a different walk of life.  Whether single and working it, single and mingling, dating, engaged, married, expecting, a house full of family.. in the 20s and early 30s you can easily find it all!


Being single, a life of mingling, or being married- there is no right or wrong answer for love.

The thing that gets me about those that love shame should look inward.  And that more often than not it's not just comments.  It's actions, looks, words, and then the assuming of what the "couple" would want to do or be interested in.

If someone told me a couple years ago that my "friends" would love shame me, go along for the ride, and eventually throw my husband and I out of the picture I wouldn't have believed them.  Love shaming starts with comments like "she's a train wreck", " they moved fast", "aren't they a little young", or "didn't she just have a break up?"  Love shaming doesn't just happen to those in relationships.  People get bashed all the time for "getting back out there too quickly", "not knowing what they want", or "not letting the past go".

I was dating someone when I met David.  And before we knew it, I had made decisions and he and I started dating.  One year later, we were engaged.  And boy did we get some looks and even "friends" made comments.  We weren't stupid and we're still not.  But you know what- we FELL, we literally fell in love.  You can't decide when you fall in love, it just happens. Even still, I feel that there are people out there who look at "young relationships" just waiting for them to "crash and burn".  Not just young marriages, but engagements or even after just a first or second date.

Why are people so spiteful and have so much hate in their heart?  Why are they sending negatively to those of us that are just creating more "love" in the world and are in genuine happiness?  What's so bad about being madly in love?  Nothing.

So to all of you in love- young, old, fresh, or forever- keep on lovin'!  To those of you out there and putting your heart on the line- keep following your heart and don't ever let anyone make you feel unworthy of love or ready for that belly turning, heart thumping, ADVENTURE!

leave the "eh" behind

hugs, abi